Mick

Jorgen was right - you never wake up expecting to dig a grave for your best friend.
Everything that's happened so far this week is really making me re-evaluate the way in which I prioritize my life. I don't think it's right. I don't understand why I'm going to school, why I have a job, why I wake up and spend so much time getting ready in the morning...what the hell am I doing?
There's only one thing that matters in life - connections. Not only connections with people, but connections with all things - animals, nature, everything. Between Jorgen, Mick, and myself, we developed a connection on such a deep level- one that I didn't even know existed until then. People can laugh and say that he was just a cat, but I saw him as my equal, if not more than anything I could ever hope to be. The year and a half of my life with Mick in it was the closest thing to heaven I'll ever get. It's unfortunate and unfair that from now on he has to live on through me, because I can't represent him the same way he could have represented himself.
I keep thinking, "When am I going to feel good again? When will things be back to normal?" But I realize now that I don't want things to be the way they were before. I want to live knowing that I don't care how attractive I appear, how much money I make, how jealous I feel, or how well I can fake it by putting on a smile for the sake of customer service. It's all bull shit. I need to embrace the people/animals/things I feel REAL connections with.
Nothing else matters.
I'll always love and miss you Mick. You'll always be my best friend. There won't be a day that passes that I won't wish you were here with me. I'm so sorry.